Tuesday, 31 May 2016

merry merry go round

So....in the merry go round that appears to be my life, or at least my emotions and therefore the nature of the things I write, yesterday I was glum but today I am feeling more on an even keel. (terrible mix of metaphors there....sorry, purists) I may not have been able to go to a BBQ and wear my mantle of 'normality' but hey, that was yesterday!!!!! Mantles of ordinariness and normality and fitting in are probably over-rated anyway!! Today I have managed to field a Boy onto his bus, have an unexpected coffee with a chum and her lovely son, plan a spot of pot gardening (it's all in the planning I am told), encourage the printer and computer to talk to each other so that I could print some Important papers and have afternoon tea out with my lovely M before the equally as lovely, if more challenging ,Jboy returned from his most marvellous day at the Most Marvellous Day Centre. I feel as if much has been achieved. OK so I haven't solved  the world peace issue, or the UK in/out of the EU issue or even thought about what we are having for dinner BUT it is all comparable!!! Sometimes  simply getting through the day is a victory!!!
Maybe my merry go round is like Mary Poppins' ...the carousel horses sometimes gallop off and do their own thing!!! (I love that notion)
Happy Tuesday and very nearly Happy June!!!!!!

The End

Monday, 30 May 2016

bank holiday Monday moan(feel free to ignore)

So...this might be a bit of a moan..feel free to ignore. It is SO hard trying to  be 'normal' and 'ordinary'. We have been invited to a BBQ today with lots of other people we know and love but we won't go..we know that Jboy might not get in the car, might not get out of the car at the other end if we DID manage to get him in the car, might not go in the house if we got him out of the car and then might not get back in the car to come home. He probably couldn't eat the food either and would be anxious about all the people....some of whom he knows but some of whom he would not know. It wouldn't be fair on him to try to make him do all that just so we can wear the mantle of fitting in. Just to try to help ME feel part of a community instead of isolated and weird.
Moan over. Thanks
The End

Sunday, 29 May 2016

Jboy and the Sunday outing

So...Jboy and the Sunday outing...M was Parent on Duty today so by the time I emerged from sleep, he and Jboy were raring to go..., after doing housely things such as hanging the washing out, we were all ready to go. M and I had decided that we would not go to a garden centre today but that we would try our alternative Jboy-entertaining activity of parking at a goodly distant car park in the city and walking to the centre. Jboy often has his own plans about going out...however, he fails to let us in on the secret and today was no exception to that rule. He was clutching his Going out Bag which contains all that a Jboy could need or require so evidently wanted to be out....we introduced the idea of going in the car.This was when we realised that HIS plan and ours were very different. He was very ...er....physical in his disapproval of the idea. I have the scratches on the backs of my hands to prove it..and the hedge at the front was bedecked with strands of my silvery hair which Jboy had seen fit to remove forcibly from my head. Maybe he felt that the hedge lacked some shiny decor!!!! M and I had determined that our plan was the one which was going to happen today so after some considerable negotiation (ie me saying."Car or house?"repeatedly to the Boy , using the well used broken record technique, so that he knew the alternative to going in the car was NOT a stroll into town (we did that yesterday and will probably do that again tomorrow) but rather staying in the confines of the house) he climbed into Velma and our day could continue. Once ensconced, Jboy was a smiling and chuckling picture of jolliness as we set off for our nearest city. We parked, not in our usual Narnian car park, but in another known to us but not so well known to The Boy. We were quite early so the town was relatively empty and walking through was not the trial it can sometime be as Jboy grabs and flaps his way along. We passed what seemed to be a massive celebration with drums sounding out loudly into the street. The people flocking to this celebration were all beautifully and ornately dressed in long golden saris and elaborately decorated clothes. It sounded like fun!! M and I wondered if we would manage to get Jboy past the drums and thankfully we did. We went to our usual haunt for refreshment then, having been fed and watered, we made our slow way back to the car. This time we passed two chaps playing oil drums, saucepans and plastic bins in the style of Stomp, without the dancing. They were outstanding. Meanwhile,Jboy had spotted a children's merry go round in the distance with flashing lights which won his interest. So, off we went and then we stood by said merry go round for some time until M and I managed to entice Jboy away with promises of sandwiches. After a minor protest about getting into Velma, we drove home and here we are.....home at last. Sandwiches made and consumed. M in the garden and we are watching WallE(again)...well, it turns out I am watching WallE while Jboy has a nap. These outings don't half take it out of you, you know!!!
The End

Friday, 27 May 2016

Jboy and the bus shenanigans

So...Jboy and the Bus Shenanigans.....as some of you may remember,Jboy was sent home unexpectedly last week, in sickly disgrace. He wasn't sick...just needed a little pork extraction. Since then , he has been reluctant to get on the bus of a morning,despite it being the Right Bus, , with the Right Driver, the Right Escort and arriving at the Right Time. Why could this be, one wonders? I have a small theoryette. I think he might be anxious about getting on the bus because he just isn't sure any more whether he will be made to come home and spend an unexpected two whole days with Mother, or whether something else unexpected and therefore quite scary might happen. Whatever the reason, he has made getting on the Bus a mammoth task this week. For 3 out of the 5 days this week, M has been at home, not quite having escaped the clutches of hominess to go to work, so the Most Marvellous Right Driver has been able to scurry from his vaulted position as driver to ask poor beleagured Mike, dressed in his smartly pressed work clothes, to come and heave the Boy into place. This he has done. Today M had managed to extract himself from the house so it was all down to me. I managed, with the judicious use of the knee and an adapted hitch kick (pause while all the dancers envsage this most wondrous of thoughts) to flip him onto the bus before he could adopt the jelly legs approach and lie on the pavement. Go, me! Of course, next Monday is a Bank Holiday which leaves me wondering what the Tuesday Bus Ascent will be like!!! Talking of things vehicular, M has been making noises about changing Velma for something different. Admittedly it IS tricky getting Jboy into Velma but once in, she is a delight. I am most fond of Velma. To me ,cars are all much of a muchness and yes, I am that person who asks the colour before anything else about a car! As long as cars work, they are fine. Velma ,on the other hand, has a benign and gentle air about her. I shall be glum when the time eventually comes to say goodbye. I once felt similarly about a mini. My parents donated it to me when I was a student. She was called, originally, Minnie. She was so old, though, that as I drove to and from university, bits of her would fly off as I went. Indeed, the M5 was bejewelled for about 3 years with bits of Minnie. Eventually, she was held together with gaffer tape and that stuff people used to patch up cars, hoping that it didn't look like a badly stuffed cushion. (The MOT must have been more lenient then). At last the day came when all the special glue and car stuff and gaffer tape in the world were unable to maintain the belief that she was still roadworthy. By comparison, Velma is at the height of her beauty and strength..there is just the minor problem that it is hard to get the Boy in. As the raison d'etre of us having a 7 seater is simply to transport the Boy safely without him being able to cover the driver's face with his hands (yes, this HAS happened) or grab them firmly by the windpipe (this too), maybe I will be forced to consider the possibility of Velma being rehomed at some not too distant point while we seek another method of transporting the Boy which keeps him happy and us safe. Maybe we could simply tow a special caravan, equipped with noisy toys and fairy lights for the Boy to sit in, much like a carriage. Of course I jest........or do I????
The End
PS I was writing my journal in a cafe today and I noticed that I was using a pen called 'Le Pen' Marvy...must have been made for me!!

Thursday, 26 May 2016

tra la la

So...guess what I saw today at silly o'clock.....yes, a baby deer. A deerling. A deerlet. Yes, mummy and daddy deer have indeed produced at least one baby. There may be more but I only spotted one. That's the end of my summer bedding plants then!!!! Jboy was suitably interested then banged loudly on the window to scare them away..which it did. I have slightly mixed feelings about it all....the baby deer are SO sweet and it all looks idyllic and lovely...until I see the result of their visit in the form of munched mesembryanthemums!!! That's less sweet, idyllic or lovely. Now,while I was bathing the Boy this morning at something like 5.00am, I decided to have a little trill. I had singing lessons in the not so distant past and loved it..until it became a choice between the family eating and having toilet roll or me having singing lessons. With a sigh, I made the grown up decision....but I remember some of the vocal warm up exercises..so I flexed my singing muscles and had a trill. Jboy enjoyed it..in fact, he laughed and laughed and laughed. Hmmm. That reminded me of another time I was singing in the shower and heard M thundering up the stairs...he hammered on the bathroom door, saying, in an anxious tone,"Are you alright in there? What's happened?"..."I'm singing,"I replied. "Oh,"he said,"I really thought you were in pain". Hmmmm..perhaps I won't go in for that talent show after all!!!!
I know...maybe I could sing to the deer!!!!!! That should solve that problem then! :-)
The End

Monday, 23 May 2016


So...decisions, decisions...you know when there are things you have make a major decision about but find yourself in a state of paralysis.....you will find me there today. Life and stuff. Why isn't it straightforward???
The End

Friday, 20 May 2016

who needs a gym when you have a Jboy?????

So...another day of walking around, trying to keep Jboy entertained and off my head, while he is not being sick..(see above(or is it below??) posts for further info if you wish). We set off into our small market town at 8.45ish having been up since 4.30am...felt like we had done a day already!! Jboy was happy to walk into town and have a stand on the square. He was a little reluctant to go to the café but did so. We met with a lovely chum...in fact my new definition of a true friend is someone who will go into a coffee house which they do not like and drink the coffee which they find unpleasant in order to keep me company and delay the onset of maternal madness..Thank you, lovely chum (you know who you are). Once we had completed our stay in said coffee house, Jboy was off.....we resumed our position on the town square where we spent many a happy hour, beside a bench while he watched bus after bus...after bus after bus ,in fact( we were there for some time!!) When I could stand it no longer, I whispered 'time to go home for a  sandwich' in to his shell like ear. He responded positively. At first. The positivity did not last ,despite continued whispering and even the singing of a sandwich song. Coming home was a trial. A long drawn out trial....but home we are at last and I feel physically as if I have completed a circuit or two(or 5) at the gym. Everything aches . Jboy, however, has his coat clutched in his hot little hand and is looking at me hopefully...I am going to watch DG this evening doing what she loves to do. I do hope I stay awake!!!
The End
 a shell like......

Thursday, 19 May 2016

Jboy and the admirer

So..here's a thing...every Thursday, the MMDCstaff take my Boy and chums to a Tea Dance where they and others of  Other abilities get together and have a jolly time. At this Tea Dance,Jboy apparently has an admirer..a female admirer. She is, so I am told, very attentive. He , however,likes to employ the technique of largely ignoring her.(Treat 'em mean and keep 'em keen- perhaps?)  Today, Jboy was not at the Tea Dance because he was at home with me, not being sick (Rules is rules and I DO understand that, really I do). A few minutes ago, there was a knock on our  front door. I unpeeled Jboy from my shoulder (M is away,watching DG doing what DG loves to do)and found one of the MMmembers of the staff from the MMDC. He had brought with him an invitation from Jboy's female admirer.... to her birthday party. Sadly, there was no date or address or information of any kind...so her love may have to remain unrequited....and Jboy will just have to maintain his reputation as 'aloof man about town'.
AND, on another note, what dedication on the part of the member of staff to bring it round ,personally..told you they were Marvellous!!!
The End

rules is rules

So...Jboy and the story of the non-vom...as some of you may have read on my blogette, Jboy decided to fill his face and consequently his oesophagus with some contraband pork, stolen not so discreetly from our kitchen. This incident took place on Monday evening so poor Jboy spent Tuesday and a part of Wednesday, trying desperately to swallow what turned out to be a rather large lump of pork. He cannot/does not chew and has teeth which are not designed for biting small pieces of food so the pieces which he stole were ..well, big uns. He could drink and was a very happy fellow, clearly not in pain but just unable to eat anything of substance. He was desperate to continue with his normal routine so went off to the MMDC on Tuesday...had a good day, didn't eat much, came home and after some warm water with honey in it (I read that on the internet so it must be true), regurgitated some of the offending food stuff. On Wednesday he was very happy and insisted on going off on the Right Bus.....at lunch time, just as I had arrived at my lovely chum's, my mobile trilled. Yes it was the MMDC. Jboy had 'vomited' and needed to be sent home at once. I drove like the proverbial wind (being careful to maintain the speed limits, officer) and arrived moments before he did. He was very grumpy. Not because he was ill but because he was home at The Wrong Time. The lovely escort said,'Oh he isn't himself..poor boy' to which I replied.'He doesn't want to be home. It isn't The Right Time'...I had to employ a song routine to get him off the bus which worked but he wasn't a happy chappy. Not happy at all. Thankfully I have a close relationship with a couple of lovely medics (one of whom is my son and the other his lovely wife)(i know other lovely medics too but on this occasion they weren't involved). Both of the aforementioned lovely medics had given me advice...so I was armed with fizzy drinks and various other digestive aiding bits and bobs. Jboy swallowed this medicinal help, making a face which would have been amusing at other times..he was not impressed...then (all those of a weak disposition look away now) he gave an almighty belch and jettisoned a large lump of still recognisable meat across the room and then immediately started to demand sustenance....and tried to eat and drink for England. Now, the 'non-vom' aspect of this tale is that he was certainly ejecting any food (prior to evacuation of offending article) but it wasn't vomit..it was simply regurgitation. HOWEVER, rules is rules and he is not allowed to return to the MMDC for 48 hours. Just in case it is a bug. Which it isn't. He is NOT HAPPY. We have spent a fairly jolly morning in our little town but we did spend an inordinately long time there, walking up and down and then up and down again, passing the same people several times who eventually stopped saying 'hello' and merely smiled wryly instead.... and now we are pinned in front of Shaun the Sheep......and that is my tale of the non-vom.
The End

Tuesday, 17 May 2016

Jboy and the incident of the meat.....

So...yesterday I was in one room just finishing a phone call and Jboy wandered into the kitchen.  When I followed him there, moments later, he was sitting at the table looking a bit guilty. And so he should...what had he done???? Well he had stuffed a goodly amount of meat (cooked pork to be exact) into his mouth. Now, bear in mind that he cannot chew and the configuration of his teeth make it such that he does not bite, and you might be able to imagine the large lumps of meat which he managed to get into himself before I appeared. He was clearly not himself and spent the whole evening gagging and returning undigested pork to us. We gave him a prolonged warm bath and eventually settled him for the night once he had stopped gagging......today M and I had a great debate about whether Jboy was well enough to go to the MMDC or not.  Jboy was exhibiting no signs of distress but neither did he want to eat....I decided that he was well and happy and therefore could go. He is now home. He has had a lovely day...but he has eaten no lunch.....he is obviously not quite right. I have had an extensive internet search for remedies/advice. I think it has been helpful and reassuring on the whole. He is happy, laughing and jolly but not eating.....any advice would be gratefully received.
The End

Monday, 16 May 2016


So...I am reading a book  called 'Unglued'...the author is talking of an emotional ungluing here..those moments when you explode as the final straw hits you...of course, I am sure no one who is reading this has even experienced that......when the computer freezes for the 100000000th time and you were just about to order something/pay for something/submit something/save something.....whatever it might be. A moment when all you want to do is throw the thing out of the window. Or stamp on it really hard. Oh, that's just me then??
Often, these emotions are  like a cauldron inside and you manage them until the last thing happens, whatever it might be. I know I have talked about this before in reference to a glass of water which is completely full and a sort of dome forms (the meniscus) so that when even a teeny tiny extra bit of water is added, it overflows. This is another way of looking at the same thing I suppose. (do you sense a theme in my life??? I cope. Then I don't.)
This author talks of emotions being glued together then one last thing happens and you become all unglued. I have enjoyed reading her book because she talks of those times when you have shouted out loud about something which last week might have been received  differently (sorry children-mine) and how you deal with it. She talks of not being able to control your circumstances, but controlling how you think about them and therefore how you react to them. She talks of not being defined by our mistakes ..nothing new ,I know ,but it is good to be reminded of these things and good to know that I am not actually the only one in the world!!
Well, off to the garden where I can potter and plant and enjoy the May sunshine while it lasts, feeling relatively well glued together, knowing that if/when I start to unglue , it will be OK.
The End

Friday, 13 May 2016

an empty head and a dog post

So....you know that feeling when you have so much in your head but just can't get anything out....my head is bursting with thoughts and feelings and words but I can't get them out in a proper order. I have been sitting here, looking at this blank page, willing the right words to tumble out. I write this blog to keep myself sane and to inform anyone who wants to read it about life with a chap like Jboy. Today, there is too much inside. I can't unravel it sensibly. I do have moments of  clarity..mostly at 2 or 3 in the morning when I am up with Jboy but have no means of recording my thoughts. I always think 'I will remember that' and sometimes I do but sometimes the thought  just falls right out of my head, never to be seen again. Today was one such day.

I do, however, have a facebook page which is sometimes different from the things I write here. Today I had a thought about dogs and their humans.  I shall share that with you today...

So...I have heard it said that dogs look like their owners...or the other way around and anyone who has seen the beginning of the Disney cartoon version of 101 Dalmatians will be able to note that this theory is not just confined to the narrow bounds of my mind. It is a fascinating idea. HOWEVER, Jboy and I would like to disagree or at least state that this not always the case. We see many a dog and its human walking along of a morning and we have noted (well, I have..Jboy less so) that is in fact a rare phenomenon. Today, for example, we saw a young man (well, young to me as almost everyone is these days) sporting very slightly scary tattoos across both cheeks. He was dressed in black , that ominous 'don't mess with me' sort of black and he had that 'don't mess with me' sort of walk too.....and he was walking his dog. Guess the dog? It was .....a very cute Yorkshire Terrier, trotting along , tail in the air and a doggy smile on his face. In addition to this observation, while M and I were on our jolly jaunt, we stopped at a motorway service station where we saw a gentleman emerge from his car. He was tall and very muscled, arms like the proverbial tree trunks. He reached into the back of his car to retrieve his dog which turned out to be a.....teeny tiny chihuahua. Maybe both of these fine gentlemen have dogs which reflect their inner selves as they certainly did NOT reflect their outer selves..or maybe they were walking them for someone else. Maybe there is a PhD in there somewhere.......
I had a Golden Labrador...not sure what that says about me....
The End

Wednesday, 11 May 2016

Wednesday again....

So...another damp morning in paradise. Jboy and I braved the raindrops to take up our position and wait for the Right Bus. As we stood, we looked around at all the lush greens of the trees and bushes around us. There is one particular tree which tells the seasons beautifully and which is now vividly dressed in green..it must be Spring! This morning, i had a look in my Forest of Coats for a suitable not too warm and yet warm enough coat which would be suitable for standing out in the misty moisty weather. i found a long, unlined leather number which has been languishing at the back of the forest for some time. M has a leather coat and is reluctant for us to be dressed similarly..I think he was traumatised by my lovely mother's attempts to make him feel part of the family, many years ago when he and I were new. She knitted us matching jumpers. Not so bad in and of itself .....but they were blue and white sailor style jumpers complete with large sailory collars. She had worked very hard so we had to wear them for at least a day in her presence. M has never been quite the same since! So this morning, I unearthed the long leathery coat and didn't get at all wet. Huzzah!!!
I leave you with the imagery of M dressed in a sailor style hand knitted jumper...and with a look of despair, concealed by a smile, as he tried very hard to be happy and please his future mother in law.

The End

Tuesday, 10 May 2016

normal service resumed....

So....normal service has been resumed with a 1.30 am wake up call from the Boy himself. He is a very happy fellow to be home and have his parental cuddles once more. As we stood on the Pavement this morning, waiting for the Right Bus with the Right Driver, we surveyed the world. Jboy was completely fascinated by a large snail which had made its merry way up a shrub to the top and which was munching its way along. Jboy enjoyed watching its tentacles twitching and its slow snail slither. He then noticed the raindrops, captured in the folds of a neighbouring leaf whorl, and thought they too were fascinating but in a different and more shiny way. And so we spent our time, watching and waiting. Waiting and watching until , joy of joys, the Right Bus came with the Right Driver and the most marvellous escort.
All is well in the world.
The End

Sunday, 8 May 2016

road trip!!

So..I am returned. I was poorly for a while then M and I had the delight of being able to go away as Jboy was at the MMRC. M had no idea where we were going, as I had arranged it secretly. He knew we were going somewhere, just not where. We set off to our first stop...a well known rose nursery . Of course, I had forgotten that this is NOT the rose flowering season so there were rows and rows of beautifully pruned green bushes which , I imagine, in the summer would be fantastic to see and smell...a veritable feast for the senses. However, M and I have fairly vivid imaginations and were able to picture it all. We ate lunch in the very lovely café, with all the other old people(!) then purchased two roses which promise to be fabulous.(If the deer don't get them first) On to the second part of our road trip. I have a very pleasant satnav app in my new phone. I have called her Emily so Emily took us through the glorious English countryside to our next destination. Here, we found our B and B which was situated at the bottom of a hill. We discovered that the small town ,ancient and ringing with history, is built on a hill so everything is up and down. We  spent the next two days exploring the town with all its ancient buildings (over 500 listed buildings in the town) and walking along the river's edge and through woodland, places we could never go with Jboy as he can't manage such terrain. To M's delight, the town also has its own brewery so we paid a visit there to sample the local ale. He was such a happy chap! When our sojourn had finished in this lovely town, we moved on to the next stop, with the help of Emily, of course. This was a small Cathedral City which M has always wanted to visit. We strolled through the streets, sat a while in the cool of the Cathedral, saw the sights to be seen, lunched then moved on to our final destination. This was slightly less exciting as it was a place where M had to go to a conference. Our B and B here was not charming as it had been in our first venture. This one was far more utilitarian in nature but it did the job. We slept and breakfasted then , again with the help of trusty Emily, we found the conference centre. I saw M off then after a quick look at a street map , I marched off, purposefully ,in the direction of the city centre. I have the sort of brain which remembers maps quite well so I walked, joining in the sea of workers as they swept along to their various day jobs. And thus I spent my day...finding bookshops, cafes, interesting little places, a river walk, a park by the river, Harvey Nicholls (simply because I had never been to one) until my feet told me in no uncertain terms that they had had enough and could I walk them back to the conference centre please. This I did. The day was hot and my feet hotter so the cool of the foyer at the conference centre was a welcome experience.  I supped my large cold drink, surreptitiously removed my clogs, finished my book and waited for the conference to finish. The conference was being held in a large hotel so the foyer was a meeting place for various other parties using the facilities..I enjoyed making up stories about the people and what they were there for...such fun!!  At last, a trickle of M-a-likes began to emerge from somewhere in the depths of the hotel, followed soon by the M himself. We drove off, with the help of Emily, and made our hot and weary way home. What an adventure. It felt as if we had been away for weeks, not just days. Tomorrow, all will be back to normal with the return of the lovely Jboy and the travels up and down the countryside will be a memory. fast fading.
Still, it was fun while it lasted.
The End

Monday, 2 May 2016

poorly peep

So..it is a bank holiday Monday here in the UK... and sadly I am not too well so I shall be away for a day or two
The End