So.....today my boy comes home after almost a week away. This is our last break for three months as they refurbish his Most Marvellous Respite Centre. I feel calm and relaxed and have even caught up on some much needed sleep but , quite honestly,the thought of three months without a break is causing me to feel a little wobbly and weary in anticipation. I love my boy but the toll of day to day and night to night constant caring mounts up and makes me feel somehow shadowy. A shadow of the real me. Or a one dimensional version of myself. It is weird and very hard to explain. I am subsumed into Jboy and we become one.
Obviously we are not and maybe that is a bit overdramatic, an overstatement. I am sure many parents of small children feel something similar..where do they end and the child begin?
Still, we have had a good few days and filled them with good positive things and lovely people so I shall gird myself and greet my lovely man-boy with all the love that he deserves. He is a treasure and enriches our lives in so many ways. In reality, my one dimensional moments and my shadowy self are but a small (personal) blip in this interesting life that Jboy has brought us.
So, on to face the next three months with a smile, sometimes gritted teeth and a knowledge that there are people worse off than me!