balance....

So...balance....not just the ability to stand on one leg (although that too) but the whole life balance thing...getting it..or not!

I have a middle ear thing which means that I find balancing very difficult. I think I must have always had it because I found riding a two wheeler nigh on impossible and once,when M and  I were  first married, we decided to cycle around the city where we lived at that time. One fine day, we set off ...tra la la...it was a lovely day. Clear skies. No wind. No rain. Nothing to cause any cycling type incidents.  M led the way. As we were cycling along, I just....well, tipped over sideways, incapable of staying upright. Thankfully, M had just turned round to see where I was and how I was doing and so saw me in all my glory tipping sideways onto a busy city road!!! He said it was as if I was in slow motion...a graceful arc forming as I went sideways and landed, inelegantly on the road. No damage was done other than to my pride and my jeans.  I was a pilates-partaker for a while until I realised that every time I lay down flat to do the exercises, I felt waves of nausea coming over me...... took me a while to link the two things..bit slow on the uptake sometimes!! So I have had to abandon all thoughts of core exercises and the like (oh dear!!).  A few Summers ago, I woke up one morning and fell down. Then I got up and fell down again. This kept happening so I decided not to stand up for a bit (as I said..bit slow!!)..the room was spinning , my bed felt as if it was at an angle, with me slipping off...I was literally holding on to the edge of the bed... and when I did manage to get upright, the ground felt spongey beneath my feet. Most odd. Thankfully M was able to do the Pavement vigil for a few days and I was most grateful that Jboy was happy to sit and watch a dvd on repeat on his return from the Most Marvellous Day Centre. When I managed to stagger to the surgery, the doctor diagnosed Labyrinthitis....and I have been a dizzy old stick ever since. It is always there, lurking, but is mostly a former shadow of itself. But the bottom line is, I am rubbish at balancing!

But balancing life..... that is altogether a different thing. Given free rein, I would choose to sing/dance/read/write/draw all day but there are housey things that need to be done...like food preparation and cleaning so we don't disappear beneath piles of dust balls. So I HAVE to be balanced. I find it a struggle. It isn't my natural condition at all.  I was thinking about Jboy (as I do) and his ability or lack thereof to balance. Physically he can't balance. He has teeny tiny feet and just can't balance. He also isn't that hot at getting balance in a metaphorical sense. For example, watching the same DVD over and over and over again until he hates it and throws it at the wall (or me) He would also eat nothing but cake if he had his way....balance..... So maybe it is a developmental thing. A cognitive thing. An ability to recognise when enough is enough??? Maybe???
Well that's a heavy Tuesday pondering.
Weigh it up and have a think....how is your balance? Are you good at it? Do you enjoy it? I could go on and on but that would just be unbalanced.....(and exceedingly boring)
The End

see Labyrinthitis.org.uk for more info